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He's Terrified of You!

Please don't think I'm sitting here pointing my finger at you ladies and lecturing you on dating. Everything I write about is a reflection of my experiences, failures and reflections from my past. Let's rewind 5 years, I am a 28-year-old, professional lady. I am pursuing my career in a male-dominated industry, and my 5-year plan was written in stone! I was throwing punches (both literally and not) in my professional life to keep up with those in the industry around me. I made huge sacrifices to get to where I was, and my professional and personal life was pretty much the same thing. Then came dating. When finding a partner I had a checklist of everything I wanted from him (which isn't a bad thing), but it was a long list, and I felt it necessary to communicate my ambition on the first date, so they knew I was a serious and driven career women and not to f*&k with what I created and my future plans. What resulted was a lot of first dates, and very few second dates, even with great guys, and I didn't understand why. So, of course, I threw out the timeless professional lady excuse "He's intimidated by me!".

Upon reflection, I realized that I was absolutely terrifying. Instead of leaving the career women at work, and arriving at the date as the feminine, playful, flirty women that I naturally was; I would arrive in my best blazer, with my favorite ice-breaking question ready "what's your 5 to 10 year plan", and my work phone, that barely rang, on the table face up. He wasn't intimidated by me, he was TERRIFIED!

Lighten up ladies! Attend the date with every intention of having fun, laughing, flirting, allowing him to open the door for you, and pay the bill (if he insists). Work may be a huge part of your life, and you may have goals and dreams that your partner needs to be aware of, but leave that for later dates. The first date is to see if there are enough attraction and chemistry to continue on.

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